Rape Destroys Lives

 

By: A Survivor Not a Victim
April 24, 2016

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Today, I spent the majority of the afternoon researching this topic to write a post about how rape destroys the lives of the victim and their families and friends. Well, I was shocked when I saw what that search result yielded! This led me to a whole other set of research and a different topic of discussion, but I became so upset, so sad, angry, and depressed – you name it, I felt it!

At first, I was not going to write at all today, but then I decided to stick with my original idea. RAPE RUINS LIVES!

As of right now, yes, my life is in shambles. Being raped has affected every relationship that I have; it has affected my work, my sleep, my eating, my self-worth, my view of my image, and my sanity.

Every day is a nightmare! Some days might have some small happy moments sprinkled in that last for a very short time, but each and every day, whether I am awake or asleep, is a nightmare. I’m afraid to sleep because of the nightmares I get; I am afraid to be awake because of the thoughts, visions, flashbacks, jumpiness, anxiety, and constantly looking over my shoulder. I am angry that I can’t get justice, like so many others, and my rapist walks around free to do the exact same thing to someone else, living his life like nothing happened.

When is it going to end? How many more victims do there have to be before things change? Before society changes? I ask myself this question many times a day. How many more? How many more? How many more? How many more? This question plays on repeat in my head!

I am fighting. Doing everything I can. Reaching out to advocates, lawyers, and senators is an uphill battle. It’s like there is justice for victims, and the law and society is so concerned about protecting rapists!

Of all the people who I told that I was raped, and they replied to me saying that they had also been raped, all of their rapists never got to trial or anything! (Accept one; the verdict is still out on that friend, and the evidence is still being collected. I think about this friend every day, and I hope, I hope so much, that their rapist is tried, convicted, and put away!)

Victims matter! We matter way more than the monsters who rape us!

How many more?