No Peace

I said no

It’s almost 11pm. I’m still awake.  I’m exhausted and I can’t turn my mind off. I have to work tomorrow,  but I would rather crawl into a hole and sleep for day’s. …but sleep brings no peace.  For I am ridden with nightmares that keep me awake even when I fall asleep.

I  would rather crawl into a hole and die. But then, my two sweet innocent lil dog’s would have no one.  No one to take care of them, no one to love them,  and they will always know that they were abandoned by their mom. I could never do that to them. They are the only two beings on this earth that keep me going,  that make me smile,  and that I love more than anything else in this world.  If it wasn’t for them, I would have left this earth weeks ago.

It’s not fair that my life is in shambles.  That I can barely function.  That my sleep consists of nightmares,  and my day’s consist of flash backs and panic attacks.  And what about him? He lives his life.  Probably going on happy as a god damn clam. Maybe even looking for his next victim. It’s not fair.

I didn’t ask for this!


No one is "asking" for it

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