While I am not feeling particularly positive or hopeful today, I really wanted to write a post that is less dark. This blog is dedicated to the gruesome facts, feelings, and results of rape and sexual assault, but that doesn’t mean everything has to be so gloomy. (This post is dedicated to all silver linings, not just from rape and sexual assault )
I have sat and pondered for a good portion of the day about silver linings to being raped to little avail. Then since I am an avid researcher, I researched the topic. The result. … even less examples than what I could come up with on my own. But I am damn stubborn, so I wasn’t going to let me stop that from making this post. Although there are not many examples, I hope that this will help someone, anyone, if it helps just one person, I will be satisfied.
#1. REALIZING THAT YOU DO HAVE PEOPLE WHO CARE ABOUT YOU
Now, for me, I actually knew this already, but so many don’t. Whether they suffer from depression to begin with, or something else, if you are suicidal, you feel like you are alone. I have been suicidal (not from the rape. ..ok, maybe yes , but there was a time that I literally planned out how I would kill myself, researched it to make sure that it would not be a failed attempt ). I didn’t go through with it because of my dog’s, but I never told anyone then how I was feeling. I didn’t think that they would understand, I was afraid of their reactions.So, I know that every person is not going to necessarily be supportive, and to be honest, some people don’t know what to say, and need their own time to process what you told them. But that doesn’t mean they don’t support you. The more I tell people (and it’s not easy, I have had to do it very slowly ), the larger my support system grows. And that doesn’t even mean you “have” to talk to them about whatever happened to you after the first talk you have with them. For me, I still haven’t yet because it is too hard. But knowing that they are there, that they are really actually there and care just means so much to me.
#2 YOU WILL BE STRONGER FROM THIS EXPERIENCE
Now, personally, I don’t feel this way currently, but I have hope that someday it will be true. What I went through, what you went through, what someone else went through, every situation is different. This even goes for all situations in general, not just rape and sexual assault. Eventually we will be stronger, wiser and more capable handling anything life throws at us. If we can get through this, we CAN get through anything.
#3 HELPING OTHERS
I have always considered myself to be a caring and helpful person. For me personally, this ordeal has invoked something more in me. The aftermath of such a horrific ordeal has caused me to want to be an advocate. This is what I intend to do when I am physically and mentally capable.I know bad things happen, or people get into extremely dark places. People either deal with it and recover or don’t recover. People don’t deal with it and don’t recover or do recover. Becoming an advocate was never something that I thought I would ever do, but when a person goes through something, something that brings a passion that they have never felt, I urge you to listen to it. Just one person really can make all the different to someone going through what you went/are going through.