I have been trying to force myself to do things, even though I would just rather stay at home in bed all the time when I am not working.

One thing that I had been waiting to do since December is a paint night.  So I looked up the schedule for Boston,  found a painting that I liked and decided to go.  I asked one of my brothers fiancés if she wanted to go with me, because she has done them before.  They had to meet a photographer for the wedding that day and couldn’t change the time.  So I decided to go anyway,  and the two of us will do another one together.

So I get there today,  and walk in. A group of girls in front of me ask where the paint night ( it was afternoon,  but it’s still called paint night ) is, and are told down stairs.  So they go, I  go, and a woman by herself goes behind me.  Since I was always a happy and social person  (before the incident ) I decided to make an effort.  I  turned around and asked the woman if she was here with friends.  She said she was with her boyfriend and asked what about me. I told her that I was alone and why. She said that I  should sit with them. I asked her if she was sure, and she said absolutely!

I had so much fun. She was so nice, so was her boyfriend.  We talked,  laughed,  shared stories.  It was a blast!

When I initially signed up I was super excited. But when it came time to go today,  I didn’t want to.  But I paid for it, so I went.  I am so glad that I did. That was the most fun that I have had in over a month!

And for a few short hours,  I was actually happy! No flashbacks,  no worries,  no anxiety, no thoughts of that morning.

This afternoon was a good afternoon!

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