I have been trying to force myself to do things, even though I would just rather stay at home in bed all the time when I am not working.
One thing that I had been waiting to do since December is a paint night. So I looked up the schedule for Boston, found a painting that I liked and decided to go. I asked one of my brothers fiancés if she wanted to go with me, because she has done them before. They had to meet a photographer for the wedding that day and couldn’t change the time. So I decided to go anyway, and the two of us will do another one together.
So I get there today, and walk in. A group of girls in front of me ask where the paint night ( it was afternoon, but it’s still called paint night ) is, and are told down stairs. So they go, I go, and a woman by herself goes behind me. Since I was always a happy and social person (before the incident ) I decided to make an effort. I turned around and asked the woman if she was here with friends. She said she was with her boyfriend and asked what about me. I told her that I was alone and why. She said that I should sit with them. I asked her if she was sure, and she said absolutely!
I had so much fun. She was so nice, so was her boyfriend. We talked, laughed, shared stories. It was a blast!
When I initially signed up I was super excited. But when it came time to go today, I didn’t want to. But I paid for it, so I went. I am so glad that I did. That was the most fun that I have had in over a month!
And for a few short hours, I was actually happy! No flashbacks, no worries, no anxiety, no thoughts of that morning.
This afternoon was a good afternoon!