A Survivor Not a Victim

Overcoming Rape


Male Sexual assault

L’s Story

“Being male means legally you cannot be raped. In my case the police wouldn’t even assist me meaning justice still hasn’t been served to the the girl who we’ll just call Kayleigh for now.

She was much older than me and attended college at my highschool as it was a sixth form. We started talking as her brother was in my year and one of my best friend’s, a friendship which has since been destroyed. It’s hard to tell people or even reach out for help when you’re a male because people just assume it’s nothing major or, “you’re male you must have liked it”. I find it hard to think about and the fact Kayleigh is still out there with no justice served is even harder.

At the time I was 14 and she was 19 and decided alcohol and false promises was the best way to gain my trust.

Even to this day I find it difficult to bare with, I have since settled down with my girlfriend and started living away from home. It’s a scar that’ll never heal the most I can do is spread my message that this isn’t just something that happens to females.

Thank you.



Male Sexual Assault Victims Need Just As Much Advocacy As Females

Sexual assault has no limit when it comes to age, race, gender, gender identity, class, education, geographical location, religion, profession, or political views. All victims are created equal in the eyes of sexual assault. That being said, one group of victims whose voices go unheard far too often are male sexual assault victims. Rape and sexual assault happen to men too. Even if statistically it happens a little bit less to men than women, does that really matter? No, it doesn’t. Each and every sexual assault victim has been grossly violated, and suffers through an excruciating emotional trauma.


The views that the majority of society have with regards to the male sexual assault victim are tragic and flawed. Men are raped and sexually assaulted by men and women. If a man dares to come forward with the information that he has been sexually assaulted, the stigma attached to that is reprehensible and truly portrays victim blaming and shaming to an extreme level. Common views that are associated with this are “Real men don’t get raped” “You are a man, it is impossible for you to get raped”, “Oh please, you know that you like the attention, s/he was so hot” etc. The idea that a man is capable of being sexually assaulted is an idea that the social constructs of society dismisses; and that is simply false. Because of this, so many men live in silence with the agony of their assault, never being able to heal. For some who do come forward, they don’t receive the support they need from family and friends, as they are harshly judged and in turn are stigmatized. For others, they are fortunate to have wonderful family and friends who know that all sexual assault victims are the same, and gender has no bearing.

The message needs to change. Awareness needs to happen. The warped social construct and views surrounding sexual assault victims, especially male victims, needs to be abolished.


Watch Why This Man Thinks Rape is Halarious (I was in tears )

I know that my blog talks mostly about women being raped.  I don’t do it on purpose.  I am a woman,  who was raped,  and I talk alot about my experience and feelings.

There are far too many men that get raped,  and I think realistically,  the percentage is much higher than the current estimate.

Please take a look at this video,  it is heart breaking,  it’s a man who was raped.



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